Surviving the Untimely Death of a Loved One
Have you lost someone you love dearly? Many times, these deaths come as the result of long illnesses, but sometimes the deaths are sudden and unexpected. In either case, grief can be overwhelming.
Losing a loved one can feel like a piece of you has been taken away. Normal day-to-day activities require much more energy when you’re grieving. Dealing with the pain effectively can help you pick up the pieces that are left and continue to live.
Try these methods to help with your grief and move forward:
- Surround yourself with support. Initially, you may want to be left alone with your thoughts or you may be afraid to love anyone else again. Those feelings are completely normal and even expected. Eventually, though, isolating yourself can be unhelpful to your recovery.
- Accept the support of others. Sure, people may sometimes say the wrong thing, but most of them sincerely want to help. Seek companionship and be open about your feelings. When people offer to bring you a meal or spend an evening with you, accept it. Everyone needs support through difficult times.
- Keep it real. Be honest with yourself about how you feel and accept your feelings. There’s no right or wrong way to feel when you’re mourning. Part of the healing process involves you allowing your emotions, however intense, to come out freely.
- Express yourself. Feel free to talk about your loss with your support network. If you’re not ready to discuss your feelings face to face, start a journal or join an online community of people with similar experiences.
- Take care of yourself. Stay as true to your daily routine as you can. Regular exercise and good nutrition contribute to your overall emotional health. Go above and beyond your normal nurturing routine and treat yourself to a relaxing massage, a walk in nature, or some time to listen to soft music.
- Educate yourself. Research the topic of grief to learn the signs and strategies for coping with it. Educating yourself on the subject can be essential to the healing process.
- As you do your research, you’ll begin to understand your feelings. You’ll discover that others who have lost someone they love also feel your feelings and you’ll learn about what others have done to work through grief.
- Take it one day at a time. When you’re faced with death, all you may see is a blank wall in front of you. Looking beyond the event and imagining life without your loved one may feel extremely challenging. Your feelings may be so overwhelming that they cloud your view.
- Certainly, life will never be the same, and you must learn to adjust to living with the absence. However, there’s a brighter picture hiding behind that wall, which you’ll eventually be able to see.
Have realistic expectations regarding your progress. Grieving takes time and energy. Pace yourself: set small goals and celebrate milestones. Expect challenges when special holidays, anniversaries, and birthdays roll around. But be ready to continue on your journey to recovery.
Life After the Death of a Loved one
It’s common for people who survive a loved one to feel guilty about having fun. You may ask yourself, “How dare I enjoy life without my loved one present?” But in reality, you’re not betraying your loved done by having fun. In fact, the best way we can honor those who have passed away is by living our lives to the fullest.
